Mommy, Can We Get A Pontiac at the Mall in 1983?

You can tell that I’m getting ready to go back to Milwaukee for a visit soon. That’s why I keep surfing YouTube for commercials like the one below. Enjoy, and keep watching for the SUBTITLE.

Oh, and by the way, I’m related to these guys. Oh, and we had 800 Pontiacs from them. And I never got a doll from them. I’m still waiting. Still…..waiting….

Here’s another Phil Tolken ad at Northridge Mall. Which, by the way, was my favorite defunct Milwaukee Mall. Now with limited lighting options!

Isn’t May a great time to post a Christmas Commercial? Yes, it is. Three cheers for Northridge Mall, not to be confused with the set of Logan’s Run.

Eccch. This post is sooooo scattered. How can I make it worse? Oh, I know! Here’s some film that some guys made in an attempt at wackiness at what I’m guessing is the early 90’s in Milwaukee at Northridge Mall.

Those of you who didn’t grow up with this mall, I’m sorry. Those who did, I’m also sorry, but you’ll see some old footage of Northridge at about a minute and a half in. Yeah, also, anyone who makes it through this video gets a FREE CABBAGE PATCH DOLL.

Oh, and if you can make it through this one, you have my eternal respect for your courage.

Oh right, what was this post about? Milwaukee? This post was about something? Well, it’s too late to make sense out of this. I think everyone went offline by now to splash cold water on their face and end their friendship with me.

Goodnight, Nobody!

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I Just Have To Post This…

…because what am I going to do when I find this clip of the Bette Davis movie The Anniversary? NOT post it?

Fine. Then YOU go ahead and not post it.

This clip represents every family event I’ve ever had, by the way. NO, I DON’T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT.

I’m sorry I yelled at you.

Bye.

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And Now, Once Again,

If you email me for a date and you’re wearing a giant matted comedy wig in your profile picture, please be aware that I am unavailable at this time. Also thank you for your interest and please don’t kill me.

This has been, once again,

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Ok, Sorry, Everybody…

Sorry. Sorry. I said I was going to post more often and hey, that was a lie. I was in Wisconsin again…at least I think I was….kind of a blur…Then I came back to and collapsed on my face.

Speaking of face, I’ve become addicted to Facebook. So I am off my game. No excuses. But thanks to Facebook, I’ve got a few more of you out there reading. So howdy, new viewers!

God…what..what have I been doing? NOTHING. Oh yeah, I nearly got sideswiped a few days ago by someone in a car who had a bumper sticker that said “Reading Is Sexy” on it.

Yeah, that’s the bumper sticker, alright. You know what else is sexy, Bumper Sticker? Me punching you in the face.

Other than that, it’s been pretty calm around here. Hmm, too calm if you ask me. But until the next bizarre thing happens, and it always happens, I’m just going to have to tide you all over with a random clip of something.

What do YOU think happened on this episode of Partners In Crime?. Write in to P.O. Box Partners In Crime, Inc and we’ll read your story on the air and then cancel it halfway through the first sentence.

I told you I got nothin’. Thank you. Won’t you? Thank you.

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